So life has been quite hectic these past few months. Between finishing up school, getting a job and studying all the time, it felt like I had absolutely no time to do anything else. When I wasn't at home, I was at the hospital attending clinical rotations and learning about how a laboratory functioned. When I was at home, I would be sitting at my desk reading textbooks, reviewing notes, answering study guide questions, and trying very hard not to let my mind wander.
But even with such a hectic schedule, I had things to look forward to all the time. I dreaded my next exam; I longed for the day that clinical rotations would come to an end; I bided my time until the Board of Registry exam came around. Each week was a week closer to finishing up my short-term career goal. Each day I looked forward to going home so I could sit and study. Every other Friday, I looked forward to taking my exams and getting them over with so that I had an excuse to relax over the weekend.
But then when school finally finished and work began, it somehow felt like everything slowed to a near stop. Each day is another day for going to work and training for weeks until I will be ready officially begin my position without direct supervision. The end of training and the beginning of my offical position is the next big thing that I am anticipating.
But then what do I look forward to after that?
I'm not saying that I'm not happy with school being over-- in fact, I'm ecstatic that I don't have to worry about studying non-stop every single day. I'm glad that I've accomplished everything necessary to jump start my career. But I'd be lying if I said that I didn't miss being a student and going to classes regularly. After all, I was in school for so long that it feels only natural to be in a classroom.
Call me a nerd: if money weren't an issue, I wouldn't mind going to classes and learning all sorts of different things. (In fact, I may even think about picking up some random recreational classes around town to learn something new.)
But the fact of the matter is, I feel like I've got nothing else to look forward to except for the next day wherein I continue to go to work in the morning and then come home and sit at my computer, looking for something to keep me entertained.
Maybe I'm just suffering from some form of best friend withdrawal since one of my closest friends just recently left home to establish a new life in a different city, far, far away. The feeling isn't too different right now, as I rarely see any of my closest friends anyway; but I'm sure that melancholy is going to catch up to me when one day in the next few weeks, I feel like going out to eat and my usual dinner buddy is in a different state.
Yea... I lead a rather pathetic life. I'm a hermit who never leaves the house. The only times I ever bother going anywhere is if I'm invited out to some sort of get together or if my friend calls and asks if I'd like to have dinner somewhere. Otherwise, I'm not the type to plan anything. Of course, every so often, I might be the one who calls to see what people are doing. But then, otherwise, I just sit at home and spend the evening being lazy.
My other best friend, I never get to see regularly at all. Other close friends have other close friends. Life feels so monotonous suddenly. And I know I shouldn't be complaining; after all, I'm the one who chooses not to get up and go out and do something. I'm the one who chooses to sit at home all evening staring at television series or movies. I'm the one who chooses to have such a small circle of friends that when one leaves, I'm down to fifty percent.
And then, I know that I should really just enjoy the monotony while it lasts. After all, this is a good chance for me to relax until the next big thing. But I think the question is: What IS the next big thing? Do we really need a next big thing?
So, to address the question again: Where do I go from here?
