Back to school and back to insanity

So Spring Break was a week ago, but time flies and it didn't even feel like it was that long ago nor does it feel like it was only a week ago. Spring Break pretty much just disappeared before I even knew what I was doing with it.

I had had so much planned to do on all of those days off, and it amounted to nothing whenever I sat down and realized that there were other things I'd rather be doing than studying or finishing my homework. And so instead of catching up, I'm still at that same standing point I was at before Spring Break had started.

And now I'm two tests later and I feel like slacking off some more. There are at least twenty more questions of my Serology homework that needs to be done, but I am in no mood to finish it... as can be concluded from the fact that I'm blogging instead of working. It's just so much easier.

School is going rather well, I'd say, as I'm not totally bombing tests and I'm actually enjoying a lot of the lab exercises that we do. I actually understand a lot of it too. So all is great and I'm still looking forward to finishing all of this up so that I don't have to spend everyday studying and looking up information that I don't already know.


In other news, I've been trying to get back into the mood of writing. A few stories are getting a new dose of brainstorming, while a few newer stories are being developed. I'm a pathetic writer who can't seem to choose one story and stick to it until it finishes, and so even though I say that I've been writing, it's not really getting very far. In fact, I think I reread my material more than I come up with new drafts for the rest of the story.

Yea, pathetic-ness is my forte, apparently.

Since when have I been able to think about plans outside of homework...

I am so ecstatic, cause I feel like I finally have a couple days to breathe. Aside from having one exam in Chemistry and one small, very, very small quiz in Hematology, there's not much else I need to worry about this week. Just as well-- and I blame our down falling economy-- I have absolutely no work hours this week. The only big things happening are during the day, in which I'm in class, and one party on Saturday, in which my mother told me to get the day off because the parental units would like to take a few days and go somewhere.

And yes! Spring Break is coming around the corner and I feel refreshed. I only have two exams right after Spring break, but I'm quite caught up with one of the two classes that I'm not too worried... yet. I'm sure the panic will finally catch up to me halfway through Spring Break and I realize I haven't really been able to memorize every last detail of my notes. And then I'll lose sight of all my homework assignments, my mind will go blank, and I'll sleep in on the day of...

My worst nightmare-- which I had a couple weeks back-- happened to be me sleeping in until way after all the classes are over and still trying to rush out the door in hopes that I can still make it in time to finish my exam within ten minutes. But alas, the class period is already over and now I'm failing and I still can't figure out why the heck I can't find a decent pair of jeans to wear out the door.

Well, I've had worse nightmares, but this is one that I am adamant will never happen. And to make absoute sure, I have at least three alarms in place to wake me up every morning. And my mom serves as a persistent alarm as well.

But anyway, this week will allow me a tad bit of slack. After my exam on Wednesday, I think I'll make some plans to do other things and take a breather away from school for at least one day. I'm craving some good eating despite my lack of money, but if I continue to stare at my computer and notes and more notes, I think I might lose my mind-- not that I haven't already lost it.

In the midst of all of this chaos of going back to school, I am extremely annoyed to find that my motivation to write has been coming back to me. Of course it would, because it's something I'd rather be doing over studying constantly. And so my mind is coming up with any way possible to drag myself away from text books and notes and dumping my fragile brain on top of unfinished stories with new ideas that if I don't write down now, I'll never remember again.

Yea... I love you too brain. You strive to ruin my life and make me miserable, don't you? I thank you for your efforts. One of these days, I may have to bring you out and put you on a pedestal for worship.

But just you wait, as soon as my year and a half of this studying and cramming is over, I will overflow you with poisonous alcoholic products so that all those awesomeness brain cells will have to take a nice long vacation. Just you wait.

Nah... I haven't quite gone completely insane yet.

Sleep deprived and clawing at what little gray matter I have

Yea, I'm tired. After taking and barely passing two exams last week with an A and a B, I have just taken another test today. Tomorrow there will be an even harder exam, and then yet another one for Friday.

On top of that, I still have about fifty to sixty homework questions to finish by next Thursday when I will also be taking another exam.

From here on out, there will be at least one exam every week.

And I have a cold. It was kind of like "Hey, you have five plus exams to take in the coming week or two, but we don't think you're miserable enough. Here, have a cold. Enjoy. No returns, no refunds. But you have to keep it until you're done being stressed out. This is how we build strength in our future."

Yea. Whatever. Now I'm just delusional.

At least I'm keeping up with a few of my classes pretty well. Hematology and Blood Banking are being awfully good to me. Chemistry is a give or take, depending on how well I can manage to understand/memorize the class lecture. Molecular Diagnostics is a lost cause, so I'm just going to have to do what I can to "know everything" and then wing it. As for Lab Management, there are a lot of common sense things that could simply be derived from a real work place-- I think it'll be fine. Serology is going to be strenuous-- I can already feel it, because of the homework and all the studying I don't know how to do.

So anyway, maybe I should stop slacking off in class and actually pay attention. Not that I can right now. My nose is stuffed, my chest is congested, and my throat is a bit itchy, scratchy sore. My head is fuzzy and my muscles ache like heck. And now I'm hungry as well.

Okay, so after this bout of drama, I think I'll mellow out a bit. I've got lots of studying to do tonight, and I promised a date with one of my best friends who I've been ignoring for three weeks, probably, because of all of my classes. She thinks I died, but I assured her that I'm not that lucky right now since it seems more fun to make me miserable with the inability to breath, think, sleep, or even really see anything.

Voices echo in my head, though I'm not so sure that it has to do with this cold...

And I'm done ranting.

We're Doomed

I'm an Idiot @ xkcd.com
So this is the technologically advanced world that we live in.

I'm a little worried for the future as it seems to be going on a steady down hill, but the first priority of life is that we learn how to survive for ourselves. This is my goal starting from this year and on, because I don't know how best to help make a difference to help the rest of the world except for keeping my half-assed two cents to myself.

But anyway, life still happens.

Someone Help Me

I need the perfect remedy to stop falling asleep in class. It just never fails that falling asleep during class happens. And when I least expect it, the damn "falling asleep in class" problem hits me over the head-- then I start nodding, my eyes start drooping, my entire body slumps, and then the next thing I know, I'm drifting in and out of sleep.

I've been trying not to indulge anymore in gourmet coffee a la Starbucks because of the expense and the high calorie intake, but I have a feeling I may have to start consuming my morning shot of caffeine again. I can't stand the taste of coffee and the only way for me to drink coffee is to drink it from Starbucks. I'm not being superficial or anything, this is just the way it happened. It's either that or I stock up on Mountain Dew, and I'm not about to do that either cause I hate the taste of Mountain Dew.

The only other way for me to stay awake in class is... well, it's doing this. I'm currently paying attention to typing out this SOS blog post and I'm not paying attention in class.

Somehow, I don't think this is a good idea either.

Interesting and disturbing and more...

--Click to see larger image
Online Communities -- xkcd.com

Sometimes this is what I wonder about our world with simple online communications. Such an interesting way to put it.

In other news, Maeven has finally updated the next chapter and it seems that more action will be occuring. The story is only progressing and getting better and better. And hopefully, with more story stimulating ideas, I can also continue on my goal of having something posted on the internet to share with the reading community out there.

So Blah...

Maeven posted this picture on her blog awhile back and I couldn't help but to repost it to share with my friends.

In other news, I'm patiently awaiting the next few chapters of Through Me as the last two chapters were absolutely excellent. If only I could get to the point where writing came that naturally to me. I'm still in the middle of trying to decide where to stick my Writer's Block-- or tell it where to stick itself.

And while I'm at it, here's another little comic/pic-thingy that I like:


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

Amateur Blood Sucker

No, this has nothing to do with some new monster or organism I may have discovered.

I stuck my first victim today... Actually, I stuck two people. Only one of them gave me the tube of blood that I needed to attempt to collect. It's a new milestone for me, cause I never thought I'd be able to do something like that. The thought of puncturing someone's skin just to collect five milliliters of blood...

But anyway, I got a good, yet mild, rush from my first tube of blood collected. It's not like, jumping for joy exciting, but I'm satisfied with myself and I want to try it again. Not because I'm twisted and some sort of blood loving sicko, but because I want to keep sticking until I can do it without even thinking about it.

Then again, my idea of working as a Med Tech has always been more on the "No Patient Contact" side of things. I prefer to sit at my own little seat at my own little counter, inside the lab, and NOT have to make contact with patients. And that's the stuff we'll be doing soon anyway... it just so happened that drawing blood is something that we also need to learn how to do.

At least I know that I can do it now without too much trouble. I thought that I would be nervous out of my mind. I think I stayed pretty composed.

But anyway, as thus far goes, classes are not too bad. The only issue I have is with a specific teacher who I can't seem to stay awake for. On top of having a rather broken style of English, she's also pretty monotonous and reads all the slides verbatim. I have my laptop open doing other things in her class just so that I can stay awake.

I'm totally into my Hematology class, and as one can tell, am ecstatic about working in the lab. Blood banking is pretty interesting and new and the other courses are so-so. As stated already, I'm really looking forward to everything else in the rest of the program.

But anyway, school is good, days are long and tiring and I fight sleep now as I continue to try adjusting to being up early in the mornings again.

Happy New Year to all once again!

Happy New Year!

And for those of you who aren't really celebrating it, Happy Chinese New Year!

I wish I had a nice picture or the like to post up, but I've been so busy lately that I hadn't been able to get one. But that's okay. I'll probably do it later on tonight when I get the time, cause this is going to be a really busy week for me... aside from the New Year's activities.

I'm going to be exhausted, because between having textbook after textbook to read, I also have a few days of work coming up for me-- normally I wouldn't be complaining about it, but it just feels like I have no time for anything. I'm feeling overwhelmed.

But I'm sure it's a lot less chaotic than I'm making it sound.

And that's okay too.

In the meantime, I'm in school and waiting for class to start. And I'll be here all morning.

Let's think New Year, New Luck.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Med Tech Ahoy! -- Part 2 -- The Beginning

So I begin my new journey into a new route for my future. Really, that's just a fancy way of saying, "My first plan didn't work, so let's go to plan B... Ahah! Plan B is go for action. All is right in the world again." But really, I am looking forward to taking these Medical Technology courses. The entire program is laid out in an extremely vigorous and organized manner that even I couldn't screw it up if I tried.

To recap, the whole idea of getting yet another bachelor's degree is fully an intention of my own to pursue both a backup route for my future career as well as to secure working (and training) experience in the lab. Erego, I can finally say that I have a plan and I can even tell those job search forensic lab places that I have worked in a lab, with lots of different fun lab instruments and machines, and have been taught in the way of bodily specimen analysis... hopefully.

I hate to say that I'm using Medical Technology for my own devious plans, but really, it's not like I won't be working for the greater good of the people if I don't stick with being a Medical Technologist, right? Okay, so now I don't even make sense to myself.

My ultimate goal in life is really to become-- in some way, shape or form-- a good forensic scientist. My next step after securing a steady income and lab experience is to head on into further education. A Masters in the Forensic Sciences, if you will. This, in the end, is what I truly want at the moment.

Maybe in a few years I'll feel differently, but I even have the school I want to go to picked out. It's just a matter of finding out what I need to do to get into said school, a la advisors, information, etc, etc, etc... Money has always been an issue as well, and I'm not quite sure how all the financial aids, work aids, working grants, and whatnot actually work. I'm ignorant, I will admit that. But at this point in time, I have a pretty straight tracked mind-- finish this, then worry about that. It's probably not the best way to think of things since it keeps me from realizing the bigger picture, but if I try to do too many things at once, I can easily confuse my feeble mind.

Then where would we be? Well, everyone else can happily do whatever, but I'm sure I'd be in a world of confused messiness.

Again, I'm simple and I'm ignorant. Yes, my world is sucky, but it's comfortable.

But anyway, I start classes tomorrow morning. Everyday from eight o'clock in the morning up until passed noon, I will be learning the tricks of this new trade. Again, I am quite looking forward to this new endeavor, not only because of the future groundwork I'm laying, but also because the classes just sound really cool.

This semester its the first parts of each base course: Hematology, Clinical Chemistry, Immunohematology (of which they call Blood Banking), Serology, Clinical Diagnostics and Lab Management. Along the way, we are to incorporate everything into one whole, which is something that high school has never taught us... individual courses in college don't do jack to help a student take things from one class and apply it to the next either...

In the summer, I will be hooked on Microbiology, as I will be taking ten credit hours of it, including a two week, vigorous, nonstop Special Topics in Microbiology course that I absolutely cannot miss. In this matter, I shall tearfully wave good-bye to my twenty-fifth birthday while being tied down to microbiology lab work.

Have I ever mentioned that Microbiology is one of my favorite subjects? It's only second to Genetics. Granted, I would have done much better in that class had I not gotten a full on case of Slack-itis, but I loved all the lab work we did for Microbiology. Genetics is just extremely difficult and so I didn't get much out of it, but I really enjoyed it nonetheless.

In mentioning this specific aspect to friends, I got called a nerd. I would take it a good way because I like being a nerd, but I'm not sure being called a nerd at that point had been intended for good... -_-

But anyway, the rest of the program ends with the second part of the classes I'm taking this semester, during the fall. And then next spring, I officially begin my five month rotations and get to do some hands on.

I feel a bit excited, but I don't know if I'm going to be able to force myself to keep up. I still have remnants of Slack-itis, and my study habits are not getting any better. I guess I just have to keep telling myself that after this one year and five months, I shall be scott free from school-- for awhile-- and will have a better chance at a better job than I have now.

Wish me luck? I know I'll need a lot of it. I just hope I don't screw anything up too early in the program.

On a side note, I get a nifty little name tag and a lab coat. I feel like when I was back in high school and got put into some significant, teacher's pet organization-- somehow like I'm suddenly more important than I was before.

Hell, I am some naive little nerd. Such a loser... but a proud one at that!

So everyone just carry on now.